


Curse

by autisticblueteam



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Autistic Character, Autistic Character(s), F/F, Fluff and Humor, Multi, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-10-14 23:26:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10546146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/autisticblueteam/pseuds/autisticblueteam
Summary: Carolina and Connie decide to do a little experiment.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt from tumblr! It was a dialogue prompt for: "Are you fucking kidding me?"

“Hey, Lina?”

“Mm?”

“I have an idea.”

Carolina lifted her head from the back of the couch just to look at Connie, brow raised and a somewhat wary look in her eye, “What kind of idea?”

“Oh don’t look at me like that, not _that_ kind of idea,” Connie said, turning over in her lap. Carolina’s hand drifted up to the small of her back as she settled, knees either side of her hips, and reached out to tuck Carolina’s braid behind her ear. It wasn’t like Carolina didn’t have reason to be cautious, Connie and South may have been at their most mischievous together, but they’d come up with just as many ridiculous schemes to drag Carolina into in one way or another individually. “Totally harmless idea. Just for our own amusement.”

“Go on.” She wasn’t reassured completely yet, but she’d humour her.

“Well, South comes back from her mission with North tonight. She’ll _probably_ just flop in bed with us and go straight to sleep, as usual, and tomorrow we only have training. So, tomorrow morning− well, do you have any notebooks?” She’d started to twirl a strand of Carolina’s hair around her finger somewhere in the middle of her explanation, but now she let it fall loose at the side of her head again.

“Probably? You still haven’t actually explained, Connie.”

“I’m getting to it!” Connie said, stealing a quick kiss. Carolina rolled her eyes slightly, but smiled and returned it nonetheless. Traced circles on Connie’s lower back. “South swears a _lot_ , right? Like, enough to make up for the two of us. Enough to make up for the two of us and _Maine_ −though actually, Maine swears just by looking at you but− anyway! We should count how many times she swears in a day.”

Carolina stared for a moment, then, “…We’d run out of _paper_ , Connie.” But there was a laugh in her voice, and a grin on her lips, and she definitely wasn’t _uninterested_.

“Probably,” Connie accepted, nodding. “But come on, it’d be funny. Show it to her after we’re done, see what her reaction is.”

“This is ridiculous,” Carolina said. Sitting up she wrapped her other arm around Connie’s waist, holding her securely on her lap whilst she pulled her legs up to cross them. “This is ridiculous and a waste of our time.”

Connie grinned, “So you’re in?”

“…I’m in.”

“ _Yes!_ ” She looped her arms around Carolina’s neck to pull her into a kiss, holding it for a long moment before pulling back and letting their heads rest together. “Now we just need to find some notebooks.”

As it turned out, the _Mother of Invention_ had a distinct lack of notebooks−almost everything was digitised, after all, and those agents who may have had them amongst their personal belongings were unlikely to want them wasted on this venture. So, they decided to settle for an ongoing tally in their private comm. channel which they could total up in a file at the end of the day. It was less conspicuous, anyway. And didn’t risk them running out of paper.

True to form, South did return late at night and immediately clamber into bed with the two of them. She passed out within minutes, barely time for a hello, goodnight, and a quick kiss from the both of them. Her partners were quick to follow her into sleep, though not without sharing an amused glance ahead of the next day’s project.

Throughout the day, they marked down every curse word that South said. From the bountiful and seemingly endless stream of ‘fucks’ and the like; to the less common but still plentiful ‘shits’; to insults ranging from ‘asshole’ to ‘dickwhistle’; and every obscure, and often very creative, curse in-between. By half way through the day, their chat was absolutely clogged with tallies and it was looking like it was going to be a very long file.

South remained completely oblivious to her partners’ ongoing project, despite the odd glances and the one time that Connie accidentally sent one count to South instead of Carolina. It was only at the end of the day when, upon entering the room that may as well belong to the three of them by now, she was greeted by a very amused looking duo sat holding a data-pad that she realised something was going on.

“…Okay, what the fuck’s happening right now?”

Connie muffled a giggle, tapping the data-pad’s screen. South grew more confused.

“We, ah− we’ve been performing a little… experiment, shall we say.” Carolina was holding it together much better than Connie was, the latter now having to pass the data-pad over so she could hide her face in her knees. South raised a brow, the silent question rather obvious. “We… counted how many times you cursed, today.”

“…Seriously?” She sounded amused. Folding her arms, she jerked her head back slightly. “Okay, give it here.”

Carolina passed the pad over without another word, though she was biting her lip to muffle a laugh now, too. South took it, giving the two of them a look before turning her eyes to the screen and taking in the list of tallies. She scrolled down, and down, and down, and−

“Are you fucking _kidding_ me?”

−that was when Carolina and Connie burst out laughing, Connie trying and failing to muffle herself in her knees whilst Carolina just doubled over and let it out. South glanced between them and the tallies for a moment, a grin slowly spreading across her face, and then with a low laugh she tossed the pad onto the bed.

“You two are fucking ridiculous, c’mere.”

They were still laughing when South pulled them both into a tight hug, Connie switching to using South’s chest as a muffler whilst Carolina buried her face in her neck.

“I love you both, but you’re fucking ridiculous.”

“Says the woman whose first inclination on seeing a list of how often she swears was to _swear again_.”

A pause, and then with affection, “Oh− shut the fuck up.”


End file.
